my favorite reason to go to class

So I went to two out of three of my classes today, which much better than I have been doing in recent weeks. I used to be such a good student and balance out all of my responsibilities, but now I feel like I am just all over the place. I'm keeping up with my extracurricular commitments, and I'm actually nominated for three positions in the student public service organization, which is incredibly cool and quite an honor to me. Classes have taken a backseat, and for the most part I have been happier, until procrastination bites me in the ass and I have a Latin translation, a problem set, a response paper, and other assorted homework assignments staring me in the face.

Alas. It's my own fault, so I can't really complain about it so much as try and find a balance again. A huge part of it is motivation, which I've never really lacked, but I'm having trouble equally distributing right now. One saving grace in my Latin class is my professor. He is young. He is British. He is sexy... in a totally awkward, geeky way. You know underneath that tweed jacket (yes, he wears a tweed jacket almost every day), there is an animal waiting to be unleashed. That was the most cliche metaphor I think I have used on this blog, but it is suitable for the fantasy that plays in my head every Monday and Wednesday from 11:00am until noon.

I think I have a "thing" for older authority figures. Maybe it's a fetish, maybe it's a phase, whatever it is I need to get it out of my system. Maybe if I have a fling with my 28 year-old Coffee Shop suitor ("Cafe Guy" from now on) I'll get over it. Since high school I have always had a purely sexual crush on at least one of my teachers. In high school it was my math teacher, who always managed to say or do something that almost crossed the line. All of his actions and words could easily have been interperted in a strictly non-sexual way, but my dirty mind liked to think that he knew exactly how I might be taking it. Ha, even "taking it," sounds dirty to me. His wife never liked me, which I always found a little strange, but I doubt it was because of all of the "extra help" that I asked for, or the hugging, or winking.

Last year I used to daydream about a stats teaching assistant. He wasn't even that cute, but there was something about his crunchy-hippy vibe and love of teaching that made him a suitable fantasy. The next semester I had a Latin teaching assistant who often verged on inappropriate, asking about my private life, keeping me after class, and definitely practicing grade inflation. It wasn't that I was attracted to him, but I was attracted to the thought that if I really wanted, I probably could take full advantage of his position and not only "earn" an A with my extra effort, but have control over someone with some form of authority over me.

This semester, its my Latin professor. He is refined, and the accent really does me in. He's married or engaged, which makes the thought of him even more enticing. I love the way he makes eye contact - it never fails to get my attention. He is relaxed in a slightly uptight way, which makes me wonder what he would be liked in bed. Considering the fact that he is a Classical scholar, he would probably be dominating and virile in the bedroom. Very Virgilian, think Brad Pitt in Troy. I have heard that his wife, fiancé, special lady friend, or whatever is a gorgeous lawyer, and that she is moving from her practice a few states away to be with him. If that is the case, I think there is some merit to the assumption that he is good in bed.

I think inappropriate sexual crushes are fun. I don't think I'll ever act on one, no matter how much I want to, for a few reasons. The biggest one being that I don't know how I would initiate it. I think it would be interesting to hear from people who have had illict affairs with a professor, teaching assistant, or even more taboo a high school teacher.

For now I'll just be content with my dirty fantasies - they're pretty much what gets me up to class on Monday mornings.