One girl. One college. Three thousand guys. This blog is a blow-by-blow [yes, that was a dirty pun] account of the social (and usually sexual) misadventures of a commitment-phobic and ironically promiscuous virgin.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

tired tuesday

I could not sleep at all last night. Maybe it was the excitment of Cafe Guy's facebook message (probably not), or the warm afterglow of my conversation with Nik (also probably not). Instead of happy thoughts keeping me turning over and over in my bed, I think it was worry. I'm worried about Court, who has a lot of intense family problems arising at a time when she's still trying to figure out how to fix her own problems. I'm worried about my academic standing, mostly due to the Science course I am taking that is pretty much devesting my GPA and overall emotional stablity. I am worried about officer elections tomorrow, which are going to take up a lot of time that I don't have this week because I have a midterm in the afore mentioned science course, which I could quite possibly fail. I am worried about not being able to sleep, which makes it even harder to sleep.

I think the best course of action for all of these worries is denial. There is nothing I can do other than get through my work, and try my best at the things I can't control. If I deny to myself that I'm worried about any of it, maybe I can convince myself that I'm not, that I don't care about the outcome and rest easy knowing that I did what I could.

Obviously I am mildly neurotic, so no matter how much I try to pretend I'm not anxious about everything it won't make me any less anxious. At least I can usually fool other people.

Denial aside, my next most appealing option is distraction, which would pretty much amount to fixating on more the more enjoyable things in my life like boys, blogging, or organizing my shoes in the manner most efficacious to acessorization and space maximization.

Speaking of my shoes, I think I am going to arrange by color and heel size.


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